Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Delighting in our children

I have been bombarded, in the best way, with messages about delighting in our children.  I think this is an area where I have a lot of growth, maybe we all do, but I know that I have needed each and every reminder.  So with most things in life, the big picture is great... but I am a practical gal and I need someone to break it down as to what it really looks like.  Here are a few things I learned...

Show it on your face:
What do your kids see more often a look of frustration and disappointment, or a smile and delight.  Uggh, guilty on this one.  I remember years ago my friend Mandy (who one of the moms that I look up to the most and seek advice from often) said that she was making a conscious effort to smile at her kids more often.  A smile can often be contagious too!  A smile is powerful; it communicates delight, contentment, acceptance and joy.  Do you want your kids to remember you by your scowl of disappointment or by a smile of delight?  Please know I am not saying a fake smile, because our little ones will see right through that.  But we all have plenty to be joyful about.  It is just a matter of what we are focusing on, and how we are letting it affect our disposition.
(picture from last fall)

Power of our Words:
Do we as mom's take the time to prayerfully consider the words we are using to influence our kids? Are our words building them up or tearing them down?  Are our words truthful or full of false flattery?  I want my words to encourage the heart of my child, to be well thought out that it is what their little heart needs to hear.

I have been thinking about the verse from Ephesians 4:29 a lot lately:
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

I am struck by this verse on so many levels as a wife, mom and friend;  but for this post I will stick with the idea of delighting in our children.  Part of delighting in our kids is knowing them well enough to know what is helpful for building them up according to their needs.  Not just the typical "good job" here or there, but really what areas of growth have you seen in them that you can encourage?  Where do you see God at work in their hearts and lives that you can come along side and build up in them?

This afternoon I was reading a this post on  The author wrote...
"Our words are powerful. What we speak over our children is what they are going to become. If you are always saying, “You are so naughty!” “You are so dumb!” “You are so disobedient!” “You are so strong-willed” “You have such a poor attention span.” “You are crazy wild!” Don’t be surprised if they become that way. But on the other hand if you speak life: “I am so proud of you when you obey quickly and with joy!” “I love the way you share.” “You are so smart!” “I can’t believe how long you can sit and pay attention!” You will enjoy the fruits of your speech and reap a child that will live up to those good expectations and grow into teens that will surprise the world and give you opportunity to share your faith and beliefs. The world doesn’t expect much from their children, but we can expect all that God expects: obedience, joy and blessing!

“She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.” Proverbs 31:26

Delight in your children, they are your legacy, a reflection of God’s love, and your most prized possession!"

This is just the tip of the iceberg of all that I have been convicted by and learning about delighting in my kiddos.  I hope that it might be an encouragement to you as well!

" My children bring joy every day. Sometimes in bucketfuls, sometimes just a drop. I just need to open my eyes so my heart can see it."


  1. Love it! What a great reminder. I actually never thought about smiling at the kids more but the summer is a great opportunity to start! You are one of the moms that I admire the most and have some wonderful ideas of your own!

  2. Thanks Kel! Glad too about Baby boy & the update on home with him!



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